BALL OF CONFUSION

People moving out, people moving in
Why, Because of the color of their skin
Run, run, run, but you sure can't hide
An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth
Vote for me and I'll set you free
Rap on brother, rap on
Well, the only person talking about love thy brother is the preacher
And it seems nobody's interested in learning but the teacher
Segregation, determination, demonstration, integration
Aggravation, humiliation, obligation to our nation
Ball of confusion, That's what the world is today
Evolution, revolution gun control, sound of soul
Shooting rockets to the moon, kids growing up to soon
Politicians say more taxes will solve everything
And the band played on
So round and around and around we go
Where the world's headed, nobody knows
Oh, great googalooga can't you hear me talking to you?
Just a ball of confusion
Oh yeah, That's what the world is today......................................................

These words above are lyrics from an old Temptations song from the early 70's or maybe even the late 60's. I wanted to use these words in my entry today because I feel they still are just as true and as poignant today as they were when originally penned. For the past few weeks I have been trying to come to terms with my innermost feelings and beliefs. I have been in dialogue with folks who are much smarter than I probably ever will be and they have given me much to think on. Mostly it concerns my way of "seeing" this 3D life. I consider myself a simple man and I have been just trying to follow my heart in everything I do. As I ponder all the questions, all the possibilities, all the teachings, and belief systems I still cannot fully comprehend why I am here and what it is I am supposed to be doing. For a long time now I had myself convinced that if I tried to be a human being who demonstrated unconditional love for everyone then I was fulfilling my purpose for being here. So many possibilities have made me become quite dizzy trying to "understand" it all. Where did I come from? How did I get here? Have I always been here? Is there a God? Were ancient astronauts from other galaxies the ones who put us here? Is reincarnation for real? Am I going to one day "die"? If so, what happens then? Am I judged to be either "good" or "bad"? Do I get a reward? Or do I go to a hell? Will I remember anything of this earthly life when I die? Will I ever be reunited with the ones I've loved so much? I could go on and on with all kids of questions but I won't do that. I suppose the one thing that has been bothering me most these past few weeks is questioning myself as to what I am doing here. I've been told this is all an illusion, that in reality I am pure consciousness being led astray by other beings who have conjured up this world. I have heard that if someone shakes a war veteran's hand as I have and said thank you, by doing so I have given the illusion of war more strength. That maybe I should not say anything about something that is not "real". I don't know. After searching my heart the only thing I can come up with is that I should continue to show love , be love, accept love, for that is really all I am. Love is really all any of us are. You may not understand, you may even violently disagree with me but that is okay too. I really don't think I will ever live long enough to fully understand things a s they are. Maybe I should just stop thinking about all the different possibilities and just focus on being the best human being I possibly can. I hope I can do that from now on. As I see it, it really doesn't much matter if I can explain it or not. Just as long as it continues to feel right in my heart. I intend to keep an open mind on things and as always I remind you that these beliefs are mine and only mine. I don't claim to know what you need to be free and happy. I would ask all of you though, to take a short pause and think of something you can do right now to bring a little more love into this world. Life may well indeed be some kind of shadows or illusions but I figure the shadows need a little love also. Do something nice for someone because you can. Be good to yourself and even better to those you meet! "HUGS"