Friday, March 4, 2016

ACCEPTING RESPONSIBILITY & OWNING YOUR CHOICES

I have talked before about choosing the Path that leads back to yourself. Also that this path is the hardest one you will ever undertake. I know that many times in my life I have had to look at myself honestly and to tell you the truth, it hasn't been a real pleasant thing to do. And here is why I say that. We as human beings naturally like to think that we are always right and that if others can't see in the same way as we do then it is their fault and not ours. This being said I always try to look at myself as honestly as I can. But even then I am not always absolutely sure I've been totally honest with myself. And the reason for that is because my ego self wants to assure me that I am doing all the right things in my life. And if something comes along that creates strife in my life my ego then tries to tell me it is someone else's fault or maybe just bad luck. But I still try to learn each day and realize that I must listen to my Higher Self so that the ego doesn't keep me in the dark so to speak. I would like to give you an example of how sometimes our ego selves fool us into thinking we are looking at everything in the right way. Just say there is a married couple or two lovers who have been together for a while and say they truly love each other. They are happy and both of them have  a nice job they love. Then one day one of the two gets an offer from their company they work for. And this offer is a big advancement for them and also pays a lot more money. A chance of a lifetime they seem to think. So this person goes home and tells their mate I have a new job offer with more pay, more perks, and a chance to move up on the company ladder of success. The one thing though is that in order to take this promotion they will have to move across the country and work from there. This means they will have to start over and make a life in a new place, After hearing this the other person says that they are perfectly happy where they are and doesn't wish to move. This creates a problem for them in a big way. Their dreams no longer are running in the same direction. After much thinking the one with the new job offer says that they are not going to miss this opportunity for advancement. They ask the other to please come with me and we will still be together. The other person is adamant and will not make the move. So the one leaving gets angry because they feel the other person is making them choose between their dreams or staying put right where they are. Then the other also gets angry because they don't want to move. And I can see how this can happen. The one choosing to leave tries to make the other one be at fault and blames them for having to choose. But in reality (as I see it) the one leaving has actually made themselves do the choosing and not the other person. After all it was they would had decided to make the move. And that in itself brought about the whole decision making process. But because they did not want to have to choose in the first place their ego self tries to console them by having them believe it was not their fault. The ego self defends every move one wants to make. And when things go awry as they often do the ego does not want to accept as fact that they are responsible for the outcome. This is what I mean when I say it is so difficult to look at ones self and be totally honest. It is so easy for our ego to "spin" things so that we are right. When we can learn to tell the difference between our ego and our Higher self I think we begin to be able to take a more truthful look at ourselves. And that still doesn't make it easy to stay on this path. Even though I try hard to stay on it I still get fooled many times by the ego. I'm sure I will always be a work in progress. But one thing I have learned is that I am okay with my mistakes in life just as long as I don't try to fool myself into thinking I am being totally honest with myself when I am not. This path that leads back to ones self can be so very tricky. But I feel it is worth trip if it helps us to see things in a different way. Because when we do we become less judgmental and more open to others paths. Life sure isn't always what it seems to be. I feel better about myself when I don't have to think I am right all the time. Seems kind of ironic that it has taken me to where I am so much more free when I can admit I am wrong. The ego has to work really hard to convince us we are always right, but it's much easier to be wrong. How's that for a paradox? Hope all of you can see what I am saying so that when you do get on that path leading back to yourself it will be a little easier to be honest with yourself. Once again I must remind you that this is only my "Truth". I share it with you and expect nothing. You may not agree with a word I've said and I can well understand that. After all, I could be totally "wrong". Thank goodness I have finally learned that I do not have to be "right". I leave all of you with thoughts of perfect love, peace, and joy. May your days be filled with love and the nights with restful sleep knowing you have done the best you can today.

4 comments:

Chris Ledgerwood said...

Accepting my mistakes and taking responsibility for my actions hasn't always been pleasant. But, I've learned a lot about myself. And most of what I've learned is I make a ton of mistakes. The problem is my personal mistakes always affects those I love the most.

Christopher Dos Santos said...

Namaste brother Ron, how true this post is. Ego always tries to position us with the perspective of being 'right'. Often when I see people doing crazy things which hurt themselves or me, I try to remember the golden rule, * Likely they are doing exactly what they believe is right for them in that moment.*

Perhaps, their choice is 'right', possibly it is a 'wrong' choice. Maybe, we can also consider a third option brother? Could it be, there is no 'right' nor 'wrong'!

Also, we could look at what appears to be choice, then consider, perhaps there is no 'choice' at all. Philosophers have always struggled to define the concept of choice. I might add, few of them come up with an unassailable answer. Strangeness indeed!

Standing by the riverbank, the leaf floating past. Often. brother Ron, I condsider the lessons this leaf might teach me. Which seed creates its origin? Which bank did it live upon? Possibly a great wind lifted it from an inland home to the river? Maybe, this leaf was caught in the paw of an old bear, then, fell off one cool morning as he allowed the river to give nourishment? Maybe it matters not where it came from, how big or small it might be. Rather, why it exists in my vision of reality, or what can it teach me, might be the truth it brings. When we interact with others, often we get so caught up in where the are coming from, what they are doing, how they are acting, we forget to ask the important questions. How can I accept them unconditionally? What are they trying to teach me? Why have they entered my reality? None of these questions involve concepts of 'right', 'wrong', 'judgment', they just breathe loving acceptance.

I can love the leaf, it causes no harm, it teaches me great things. Similarly, I can love my brethren in the same light. I am the leaf, as I am also the brother to all reality.

The only thing I know for sure Ron, the leaf's path is natural. Its destination a given. Resistance is not part of its dominion. Perhaps this is the most cherished of lessons. Possibly a shriveled up leaf has a volume of knowledge to impart, yet, only if we are prepared to accept its story.

Excellent post brother, like the little dried up leaves floating past, you always have a knack for making me think. Thank you!

In Lak' ech... Prosper with love dear brother.. live with peace...

captron52 said...

Aah, now I see what happened to this comment. Dumbass me thought it was on the ensuing entry. I repeat that I have done the same thing in making so many mistakes. But I do think I have learned a lot about myself during the process. I hate to hurt anyone especially those who are closest to me. You know what.... the both of us will probably make a lot more errors unless we die this minute. But that only means we will still be learning about ourselves. Thanks for the visit Chris. As always the very best to you and yours. And hey, give the band members another high 5 for me!

captron52 said...

Hey Christopher I love the analogy of the leaf. I agree with you about "right, wrong, and choices. This is a tough lesson I have learned(still working on that too) through my interactions with others. I think the Powers that be keep sending me opportunities to teach me this lesson. Right now is a new chance for me to live what I talk. Looking at a situation which has brought me much pain and anguish here lately I have been able to do just what you said. And that is to look at myself instead of trying to figure out what someone else is thinking or doing. I realize I have to take full responsibility for whatever is going on in my life. The other person has a full "right" to think and act as they do. Not so long ago I would have reacted much differently by making accusations and placing blame instead of accepting what is mine to begin with. It sure aint easy this life of just accepting and just loving but I know I'm on the right track. Oops, there's that word again(Right) Thank you for your input and for sharing your thoughts with all of us. Have a good one!